Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Me, and Agnostic Satanism

My agnosticism is based on this truth: That religion is, at its heart, about comfort. In the case of religions like Christianity, it's also about control, but what is control but a means of gaining comfort?

I have no way of knowing whether Satan is real. If I heard his voice, I have no way of knowing whether what I heard was real or a hallucination. In fact, there is a very high chance that it would be a hallucination. Given the lack of conclusive proof, I probably will not know until I die.

However, I choose to believe. I choose to believe because it enriches my life. The idea of someone more powerful than me being there to aid me is comforting. The idea of an afterlife curbs the nightmare of contemplating non-existence.

Of course, there are people who cope with the idea of not existing after death quite well. And in truth, since I don't really believe there is an afterlife (I am undecided, but to prepare myself for the worst I accept the idea of non-existence), I am almost one of those people.

 Alice Miller has said that some illusions are necessary for survival. For someone who has endured terrible abuse at the hands of their parents or spouse, it is comforting to believe that things are better in other countries. The truth, that abominable abuse happens in every country at unacceptable levels, might drive that person to suicide.

The point at which illusions keep us from a truth we are strong enough to face is when they become dispensable, and the point at which our illusions begin to hurt us or other people is when it becomes our responsibility to shatter them, no matter the pain of disillusionment.

That is why I am an agnostic Satanist. I dare to hope while I am prepared to face disillusionment.

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